There once was a man who lived in a castle,
For success, he’d trample others in haste,
When it came time to go to war and to battle,
He stayed behind, claiming to combat would be in poor taste
All the while he had to make various choices but being a coward he claimed to be too chaste,
Once a pig looked at him and said “Even I wouldn’t eat you, alive or dead, I’d much rather eat my waste”
I know that at some point every one of you has encountered, befriended and/or been stabbed by a two-faced person, in some way or the other. Some of you might be two-faced people and then, there are those of you that well know your friends and companions are such but you make excuses for them.
Initially, I’d try looking for the ‘good’ in such people- and I still do- but certain people don’t deserve to be forgiven for their cowardice. Regardless of what category someone that you know, falls under, remember that making excuses for a two-faced person won’t benefit you nor him/her. You’ve GOT to call them out and stand up for yourself when the need to do so strikes.
Right. Enough of the chit-chatter, now let’s go on to analyze the two-faced batter. In other words, let’s talk about the signs that should help you recognize you’re dealing with a two-faced person:
1. They claim you’re their bestie……until you’re out of earshot.
Ah, the “He/she is my best friend’ claim. It’s almost as if though these guys were born with the sweetest tongues but then, when you turn around, that tongue can be the cause of your demise. A two-faced person will leak their said ‘besties’ secrets to the entire world. If they’re calling YOU “MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD”, just know they mean the exact opposite. They don’t really give much of a damn about you. They’re using you and no, they’re not ‘sweet’ to you because they’re genuine human beings. They’re ‘sweet’ to you because they WANT something. Once you fulfill their wish(es) you’re thrown aside and never hear from them again (if you’re lucky) OR you become their crony because they need your to help them with something or the other at all times. And when you turn your back on them, they’ll be bitching about you to their other ‘friends’ or social circle.
2. You hear they’re bad news- from others.
They say “where there’s smoke, there’s fire”. Now, you know I’m not the kind of person that allows others to affect his judgment and I’ve been friends with several two-faced, backstabbers when I shouldn’t have been. That’s because I believe that everyone’s experience is different. A two-faced person might see me, or one of his/her friends as someone they can confide in. That’s okay but if you’re the kind of person who gets affected by such behavior or people, it’s probably better that you take a step back.
You might hear stories from ‘former besties’, exes and even strangers about how wretched a particular two-faced person treated them. Does that mean they’ll treat you the same way? Chances are they will.
Speaking from experience: a few years ago I befriended a particular person. He was really kind towards me and I towards him. Many people told me to be wary of him but I didn’t listen to them. A few weeks, down the line, I discovered he was going around saying the cruelest things about me. We loathe each other now and he’s probably the only person I’m not too fond of. I refuse to waste my
3. They’re kinder in the public eye than they are with you at private events and get togethers.
A while ago a friend of mine asked me- “How can some people be so fake? How can they be so warm and kind to one another at social events? And then, be just as cold at private events and parties?”
Two-faced people change certain aspects of themselves, in public, because they wish to be likeable. A certain part of a two-faced person always craves attention and he or she will get it in any way possible. Such a person will divulge your secrets to others to ridicule you, behind you back, to make their place. I’ve personally encountered such people and trust me- it’s not a pleasant sight nor is it something that I wish for anyone else to go through.
4. They fake piety.
Such people often fake piety, preach religion and humanity but their thoughts and close-mindedness becomes apparent in fragments. If you’re someone that’s seemingly meek or gentle, you might get to see or witness what they’re actually like because they’ll feel as if they can make you do anything, they want, and that you won’t go away because you’re scared of them or because you need/want them in your life.
5. Their smiles.
You can always tell what a person’s like by their smiles. In my experience, there are 3 kinds of smiles:
Mischievous smile-rs: their smiles are warm while their eyes shine with mischief and naughtiness. These are kind-hearted individuals that like to have fun and you can see the kindness in their eyes.
Warm smile-rs: the kindness and warmth of their hearts often travels to their eyes. They radiate positivity and make you feel comfortable.
Sneers: no matter what a two-faced person does his/her smile and eyes will be void of warmth. You’ll never feel comfortable with them.
Word of advice: follow your gut and instincts with these people. You’ve no reason to let them push you around. A two-faced person is anything but your friend. Don’t trust them and DO filter them out.